It’s 7am (and, I know, we’re all tired of me telling everyone the time already…but I really am this anal!). Somehow, I’ve survived another day and, more to the point, another night without you. I’d like to say it gets easier with time, that the withdrawal symptoms have slowly faded away, but I’d be lying. For the little time we actually spent together, you have created within me such a vivid kaleidoscope of colour, scent and sensation. I want to be able to present to the world someone who can simply shrug her shoulders and say “Well, that’s life” but I can’t do that without lying. Obviously I’m going to survive without you ~ without you touching me, kissing me, holding me….. it’s just difficult to encompass how bleak the world’s become without your laughter. I’ve said so many times before to you that I’ve awoken feeling terribly disorientated because you’re not there beside me…. and I don’t know how on earth I could possibly have formed any sort of expectation that you WILL be there when I wake up since it was such a rarity, such an oddity, to have found you beside me in bed in the first place. People are strange, I know.

I’m tip-toeing around things here. I want to get far more naked right now (in more ways than one!) and I simply don’t feel capable of it at the moment. I’ll get there eventually, just not this morning it seems. I guess this is my warning to anyone reading this that I’m most likely going to wind up providing cause for blushes all ’round sometime in the very near future. (Is that akin to saying ’stay tuned’ given the human’s natural penchant for voyeurism??)

“I miss your laughter

but I miss mine more”